[Oh gosh. I don’t even know how to do this. I mean. You and Seb would take care of a child. Not me. But okay.]

• Jim didn’t know what had prompted him to take in this little child.
• It wasn’t smart, it wasn’t pretty, it wasn’t… anything really, but when he’d spotted the orphan being bullied, he was sorely tempted to put a bullet in the older boy’s brain.
• And she was still being called ‘it’ in his head when Richie knocked on the door.
• Jim opened it, and the girl’s eyes went wide, as she said her first words since she’d been taken to the house and cleaned up. “There’s two of you!”
• Richie grinned and nodded, bending down to her height. “I’m Rich. You are?” She introduced herself as Jessie.
• Jim doesn’t have the first idea how to take care of a child, and Richie finds himself over more and more, helping him and reading her stories.
• She takes after him, kind and sweet, but with a touch of cunning.
• They love her dearly.

• Jim had been traveling with the Master for quite a while when they bumped into the Doctor, on the same side for once because they were being raided by Daleks… again.
• The three of them barely got away, and wandered the ruined, dead city, trying to come up with a strategy to get rid of their mutual enemy for good.
• It was then that they stumbled across a little boy, shivering and hiding in a corner.
• The Master wanted to kill him for crying, and for once, Jim stepped in, coddling the boy.
• The Master huffed something about pathetic human emotions and left, stranding Jim with the Doctor for a while.
• They came to a strange, if occasionally uneasy, friendship with Jason in between them.
• Jason was a little ball of energy when in a good mood, and it took both of their efforts to keep up with the hyperactive boy.
• It turned out that he was quite brilliant too, once hijacking the TARDIS while the Doctor was out and about on Earth. Jim barely managed to get it back to where it was supposed to go.
• They ended up appearing about a month later, and the Doctor embraced them both in tears.
• Jim was surprised, but didn’t mind.
• Jim is growing old, and Jason is growing up. He’s a little ball of fire, an information sponge, and an adventurer.
• They’re all happy.

• This was completely unintentional.
• A little girl had approached them on the street, asking them how to find her mother.
• John was instantly taken by Clara’s adorable voice, her blue eyes and dark hair. She was so tiny, and he promised that he’d help her.
• They searched relentlessly, putting all of Jim’s tracking abilities to the test.
• About four days passed, where she lived at Jim’s flat and John came over every day to keep her company while Jim searched and searched.
• A week later, they found out that the mother was dead.
• The father had been killed years earlier.
• They tried to break the news gently to the little girl.
• Clara didn’t even cry, just grabbed onto them and held on for dear life.
• They couldn’t let her go.
• They raised her quietly, homeschooled by both of them together so that people didn’t link her to Jim and target her.
• She quickly turned into a martial artist, and grew up wanting to be a surgeon for a long time.
• When she hit college, she changed her mind and went into biomedical research.
• She now engineers both the deadliest of things and the most healing of things, and John and Jim are the proudest people in the world.

[god, why do you ask for things like this?]

Jim had finally done it, taken this young version of John Watson and corrupted him. Zach was the first to come to his side, his genius and slightly dark tendencies lending themselves perfectly to Jim’s arsenal, especially after James had collapsed to some extent. He promised that the boy would be well taken care of, and given every iota of protection to the both of them. John had seen it, and since he and Sherlock were the next likely targets, he had asked about it.

Jim responded the way he always did. ‘Everything comes at a price.’ And so John became his newest recruit for his medical team. He was treated well and treated them well. He couldn’t always stomach coming to crime scenes with them, his conscience didn’t sit well with Jim’s habit of killing people. But when Sebastian and Jim returned home- sometimes covered in cuts and bruises- John was in his element, taking care of them, wrapping their wounds carefully, disinfecting, applying cold compresses, anything and everything.

It was about five months in that Jim first asked him to come with them. It wasn’t an assassination, just a general skirmish that needed sorting, but one part of the plot involved infiltrating a laboratory where there were many known poisons, and nobody knew the traps. Jim asked John to wait behind for them, not willing to risk more lives than they had to. It turned out that this was a mistake. Even with the snipers guarding John, the whole group was captured. Jim and Sebastian barely got out of the building alive, and they searched for any sign of the others, finding nothing except the signs of a struggle on the opposite roof.

The next day, there was a message sent to Jim’s phone of all the captives lined up in chairs. They would be released if he showed up. He gritted his teeth and agreed. After all, it meant he could meet the captors, and his guards were usually intelligent enough to be able to pull something off on the spot.

Not smart enough though. He was shoved into a makeshift jail cell of a room while the others were let go. Jim huffed out a laugh and wished he could send a message of apology to Sebastian. A few minutes later, the door was pulled open and another figure was shoved in.

John! They were supposed to let you go! Jim exclaimed, furious that they had gone back on their word. It wasn’t any use trusting people, but it still stung.

Oh, they were going to, until I attacked them. Took out about fifteen of them in one go. He held up a shattered bottle of snake venom. That was exactly the moment when Jim noticed the cut on the man’s own forearm.

Fifteen… including you? Jim asked, his face dropping.

Nah. I haven’t joined them just yet. But there was a grimace growing on John’s face, and Jim knew it wouldn’t be long. He grabbed the man and sat him against the wall, using strips of his shirt to tie off John’s arm in an attempt to create a tourniquet. John just smiled and shook his head. It’s too late, Jim. Let it go.

Jim sighed, running his hands through his hair, pressing a kiss to John’s forehead. I’m sorry. He grabbed the non-injured hand and held it gently, feeling the pulse weaken. Does it hurt?

Not so much. John said with a smile. They stayed like that for ages, and when Sebastian showed up with the support group to break them out, he was met with the image of Jim sleeping, curled up next to the dead doctor, a single tear track on his face.

[[Thank you for asking! I’ll do my best to explain.

Jim Moriarty, as portrayed in BBC Sherlock, is the ultimate foil for Sherlock Holmes. While Sherlock and Jim are both geniuses, Sherlock makes darks look light while Jim does the reverse. Sherlock solves crimes while Jim creates them. Even physically, Sherlock is tall and lanky while Jim is short and relatively stocky.

Therefore, when Sherlock is portrayed as potentially romantic but asexual, I flipped it for Jim, making him mostly aromantic but hypersexual. He doesn’t like emotions, but he relishes the rush of adrenaline that comes with any sort of arousal, sexual or not. He’s also easily bored, which means that he’s demanding in and out of bed.

Round it all off, and you have Jim Moriarty, consulting cocktease.]]

Oh, yes because I’m the perfect person to ask.

What it feels like physiologically:

• dilation of pupils
• dry mouth
• breathing deepens
• heartbeat accelerates
• queasiness may occur as digestion slows down
• irrational bouts of concern for the other person may occur
• you may be fucking terrified

They had spent a year getting to know each other, working off each other’s dazzling intellect and creating monsters in the form of code that ravaged the world. It was beautiful and devastating, like two creatures from the darkness had come together to create a beautiful jewel that nobody could touch.

Except they did. He had never expected betrayal from Zach, but it stared him in the face. In that split second, Jim hated himself for trusting the boy, because after all, that’s what Zach would always be- a boy, with his heart set on being righteous and kind in ways that Jim could never be. And, fair enough, the one to find out and catch Jim Moriarty in his plans of bringing the British government to their knees was none other than Sherlock Holmes.

Jim made it out of prison about five years after that, and the first thing he did was find Sebastian, the only man he knew he could trust implicitly. In his rage, he gave the order. “I want a bullet through each of their heads.” And so the sniper did as he was told, first to Sherlock and then to Zach, as Jim watched impassively.

Two days later, Jim found himself at Zach’s flat. He still had the extra key and let himself in, looking around. Everything was just as it had been, and Icarus yowled at him. Jim fed the hungry cat and logged onto the computer, looking for anything, anything at all to tell him why this happened. The code had vanished. Every scrap of it.

In its place, it just said: “I’m sorry.”

I forget sometimes that you are not immortal. You snipe down anyone I tell you to, you are a killing machine when it’s asked of you, and I have stopped worrying about getting you killed. Clearly, that was a mistake. You knew the dangers of this particular task. We were rigging up a hotel with explosives- not huge ones, just enough to cause some major damage to one particular room, where a UN meeting would be taking place in the evening. We worked late into the night, chatting softly and amiably, smiling even. The plan was perfect.

Only something went wrong and the fire alarm went off, followed by the security alarms. We both grabbed our guns, and you grabbed the remaining explosives. Within instants, we were swarmed on two opposite sides of the room by bodyguards in bulletproof vests, and I looked at you helplessly.

“Put your weapons down!” came the order from the head of the group, and you lowered your gun. I went to lower mine, but you shook your head. You knew that if I was captured like this, I’d be killed. This wasn’t the British government that we were messing with.

For the first time in my life, I took an order from you. You told me to shoot, and I did, straight into the pack of explosives lying next to you. The wall went down in flames, and I escaped. You didn’t. I went back to London and started over, telling myself that I would find someone else.

I never have.

It sure is lonely down here.

My hand was forced. They kidnapped you, threatened to kill you, of course, and they made me give up everything I had in order to get you back. I was lost, the empire I had constructed around me slowly falling apart as these demons stole my money, my contacts, my sniper. Everything was gone, and in my mad rush, I pooled together the last of my resources and strength to go single-handedly into the pits of hell, an old warehouse in Germany, where I had tracked you down. When I got there, you looked at me with blank eyes, ripped to shreds by their knives. You could barely recognize me, and I stood there for long moments, realizing that the reign of James Moriarty had come to an end. The last, most precious piece had been toppled.

And so I pulled out a gun and shot you in the head. I held you close as your body went cold and then I walked away, never looking back. Someday in the future, there would be another me, calling himself Richard Brook, reading children’s stories in a soft voice, hoping for redemption, but he will forever blame himself for the destruction of his brother.

[struggling… to stay… in character… hope this isn’t terrible!]

• Giacomo Casanova was a shameless loverboy, Jim Moriarty was a reserved criminal who only learned how to write love on scraps of paper so he could tear them apart.
• Jim was eternally frustrated because he couldn’t figure out how Casanova’s brain worked. He hated the other man’s sentimentality.
• “Emotions! What’s the point?” Jim complained over and over.
• Until they invaded him too.
• And then he complained even more.
• Despite all the times that they made love had sex, Jim has never let Casanova come to his home.
• And then someone threatened to kidnap him.
• They were inseparable, though Jim said it was only for security, and got so comfortable with each other that they stuck even when the threat was gone.
• Giacomo proposed, and Jim would have considered refusing if it weren’t for the look on the other man’s face.
• It was then that he realized that he never wanted his lover to be sad again.
• Jim never kissed anyone so hard as he did Giacomo on their wedding day.
• Life passes peacefully, aside from the occasional criminal skirmish.
• They’re happy together and that’s what counts.

[Oooh, difficult one. I did the best I could.]

• People sometimes questioned why Mycroft Holmes had Jim Moriarty’s number and vice versa. Mycroft never texted Jim and Jim only texted Mycroft to taunt him.
• Jim once sent Mycroft chocolates. They went through every test in the book. They weren’t poisoned.
• Mycroft first met Jim when he was arrested on suspicion of murder. He must have made an impression.
• Even Jim hadn’t expected to be acquitted so quickly.
• Another box of chocolates showed up at Mycroft’s residence. This time he ate them.
• Mycroft found himself watching Jim on CCTV a lot. He called it ‘monitoring of suspicious activity.’
• Even when it was grocery shopping.
• Jim caught him at it and laughed… and then asked him out.
• “I don’t do relationships.” “Me neither.” “Oh.”
• They did it anyway.
• They got married in Switzerland. Sebastian and Sherlock nearly started a brawl.
• They still have separate flats, but they’re always together at one or the other.
• Jim hasn’t stopped his criminal behaviour, but is more cooperative when it involves national security. And by that, I mean that he catches all threats and has them taken out.
• Mycroft turns a blind eye but is secretly thankful.
• Jim knows it.

Dirty Little Secrets- All American Rejects [perfection right here]

When we live such fragile lives, It’s the best way we survive, I go around a time or two, Just to waste my time with you, Tell me all that you’ve thrown away, find out games you don’t wanna play, you are the only one that needs to know.

Jim was talkative, far more talkative than Sebastian’s patience could deal with today, and the sniper slapped a hand over Jim’s mouth after about the first ten minutes. Enough, boss. He grunts, and rolls his eyes when he can feel the man pouting under his hand. He pulls away, staring back out of the window.

Hey, Seb? Jim starts again. Sebastian is about to ignore him, but the subsequent question startles him. Would you kill me?

What, now? Sebastian asks.

Jim shakes his head. Not yet, but when you need to. Sebastian shrugs and Jim smiles and looks out of the window. The two of them can tear the world down, living to their fullest by watching the world die around them, and none of it bothers them… except this, apparently.

If I order you to kill me, you’d better. Jim murmurs. There are some secrets he will bring to his grave, and sometimes it’s better to be dead and silent. But in the meantime, you better keep me alive like it’s the only thing you’re capable of, got it?

Sebastian smiles. Yessir.